Two bodies

Two Worlds. …. Where am I Today?

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Jarad woke with a start, rolled over -

drat, I’m in world 2

and tried to go back to sleep. It was so confusing living in two bodies, and even more confusing living in their two worlds. He longed to just wake up in the same body every day, as everybody else seemed to do, and just get on with living life. It hadn’t always been like this, he was sure, but maybe it had. He couldn’t recall when it had started to happen, so maybe there were always two bodies but only one that he was daily consciously aware of. Fortunately each body was the same size and identical in appearance, so any confusion was his alone. Nobody noticed.

So today it was body 2 unless he managed to lift himself to body 1 which wasn’t always possible. Body 1 was lighter, calmer, and came with a peaceful, uneventful world. A world in which there were no opposites, in which everything just flowed smoothly in perfect timing. No stress, no worrying. In contrast body 2 was erratic, always changing, one extreme to the other. There was no peace in that body, nor in the world that accompanied it. Moving between the two bodies and their worlds was not an easy matter unless it happened spontaneously as it sometimes did, especially during sleep. But mostly during the day  it was near to impossible and, for the most part, Jarad just gave in, took whatever body he found himself in when he awoke. He had discovered that making the transition from one to the other, from the more dense body 2 to the lighter body 1, involved having a very clear focus on an inner principle, a core within his being which wasn’t always accessible, especially if there was excitement or a distraction of any sort. It was often easier just to be, to accept the reality of the day and the world belonging to the body. Of course body 1 was always preferable and brought much inner joy. Sometimes if he dozed off in body 2 after waking in the morning he would reawaken in body 1 – but the opposite was also possible and to be avoided at all cost!

So here he is today in body 2, surrounded by the ever-changing world, and knowing that dozing off was not feasible. Maybe later …..

A break in the day’s activities provided just such an opportunity. A brief rest, a few minutes of dozing off – and here he is in body 1, and in peace. And the day continues on. It is the same day, the same occurrences, but two  distinctively different worlds, two distinctively different bodies. One body, body 2, struggling with the day it perceived as difficult, chaotic – as was world 2 – while body 1 just breezed along smoothly, handling any difficulties with calmness, world 1 being a reflection of that.

Not knowing when it had started, this living in two bodies, he also didn’t know when it would end – but he had a deep inner sensing that it would, it had to end. A choice would have to be made between the two and making that choice was becoming less and less difficult. Maintaining the choice, which would of course be body 1, would take, initially, much effort. Much effort to keep inwardly focussed, consciously aware of the inner core that he had learned to recognise and which elicited great joy whenever he thought about it.

It needed to be fed, to be nurtured, to be protected. With attention and care it would, could – and in fact was – growing. Growing stronger, motivating body 1 to take the lead in his life, allowing body 2 to diminish, to become the follower rather than a challenger to leadership.

A gradual process, an inner process and an actual process. Victory was near!

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